I never thought I would be writing this. I am overwhelmed and so is Superman.
Lois told Superman she is pregnant. By text message. Her boyfriend has now left her and that's about all we know.
How do you come to terms with something like this. She has no idea what her choices have done to her life and our family.
Why can't I stop thinking about how this effects me? I didn't say anything to Superman because I know this is not the time.
This is the first time as a stepmother I have felt this way towards her. I don't want her actions to hurt me. I don't want to raise her child or my resources to go to the situation of her own making. And I feel so guilty about that.
Dear god. How are we going to get thru this?
6 comments:
I don't know what to say except I'm sorry this is happening. Allow yourself to have your feelings, know that you've already made it through so much and remember that people care about you and will be there for you. Good luck.
Oh, I'm so sorry. My jaw literally hit the floor when I read this.
Just remember, she's scared (probably terrified) and alone and needs your support now more than ever. You will get through it - you have already proven to be an incredibly strong woman.
xo
WOW I agree with EWO, my jaw hit the floor as well. That has to be one of my worst nightmares, having a daughter and her getting pregnant. I cannot imagine what you are going through and it doesn't sound like this is going to be a good situation for anyone.
I will be keeping you and your family in my thoughts, you are strong and you will make it through...I wonder what her mother thinks about this.
I've got a six year old girl in my life and to be honest I'm terrified of the same thing happening to us in the next decade or so. Especially as the mother's side of the family are conservative Catholics.
Although I don't know you or your family, I thought I would add that the world seems like it is crashing down there is life after teenage pregnancy. My cousin was 17 when he got his girlfriend pregnant. Six years later and she's the absolute apple of the whole extended family's eye.
I don't know what your politics are but I feel it is important that she knows her options, keeping the baby, abortion, adoption. I also think you need to be honest with her as to the support that your family are willing to give her.
If you are willing to be there unconditionally then great. If not, that's ok too. She is an adult and needs to take responsibility for her choices.
I've been in the situation of discovering an unplanned pregnancy and it is definitely terrifying. I'd say for sure after the blast has hit sit down with Lois and Superman and talk about options. I'm with the comment above on being opened to as many options as your lifestyle/cultural beliefs allow. Having any kind of support - even if it is just to take a good look at options is really great. Having people harp down and tell you what to choose isn't.
Good luck to all of you with this next great challenge.
Wow. It's been awhile since I have read your blog, so I'm just catching up. An unexpected pregnancy is certainly stressful on everyone. I agree with Crys in that you should be discussing possible options. I happen to know a family that wants to adopt, if she wants to go that route.
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